Line de Langen

It can happen to anyone: becoming overwhelmed by a combination of your work and your life, especially when you’re so keen to do things properly. And it happened to Line, who was out of the running for a year due to a burnout. She is now drawing on her own experience to promote mental health at ING.

A very demanding job, planning your wedding, preparing for the birth of your first child and the COVID-19 pandemic: each of these can have a major impact. Add a perfectionist personality and a fear of failure, and you have the perfect mix for ending up in a burnout.

For Line, who is now Site Reliability Engineer Expert Lead, it all came to a head while she was working at iDEAL. “My job was already hectic, but the pandemic made it even more stressful. Everyone was shopping online. For our team, that increased our workload and meant we had to work standby shifts. With an 18-month-old son, that was challenging. I also found working from home tough. I’d always been careful to keep my work separate from my private life, but that was no longer possible.”

‘A burnout is closely tied to your personality burn-out’ 

Line’s perfectionism also played a part. “A burnout is never caused solely by stress at work and at home. It’s also closely tied to your personality. I wanted to do everything right and looked for validation from others. It was utterly exhausting, and I ended up undermining myself in the process.”

Period of denial

After a long period of denial and telling herself not to make a fuss and to just knuckle down, Line ended up taking sick leave. “I was exhausted. I couldn’t concentrate, sometimes couldn’t even make sense of the words on my screen. It was really scary, but admitting that you have a real problem is even scarier. Because what will that lead to?”. The consequences were months of therapy and small steps forward – and sometimes a step backward.

‘I now make a point of doing things that scare me’

“Eventually, I was able to start thinking about returning to work. I didn’t want to go back to my old job, so I set about finding a different team. That was really daunting too, but my mind was made up. I used to avoid doing things that scared me. Now, I make a point of doing them.” And it worked, because Line ended up with three options. “I chose the team where I could ease in gently before gradually ramping up and regaining my self-confidence. I received full support from my manager and colleagues. That’s a big part of the reason that I still really enjoy working in this team and am back to working a ‘normal’ 32-hour week. It’s so energising, I’ve even started my own business helping stressed mothers relax through drawing.”  

A positive spin 

Line has given a positive turn to her story. She now uses her experiences to support the mental wellbeing of ING colleagues. As a wellbeing ambassador, she actively promotes greater awareness around mental health and helps colleagues find their way through ING’s extensive wellbeing offering.

“There is always something that works for you. I’m also very open about my own burnout because I want to help others avoid going through the same thing. A burnout can genuinely be prevented if you recognise the warning signs in time. And you can come back as a new version of yourself. That’s exactly how it feels to me. I’m Line 2.0.”